Month: January 2021

news

Due to Immense Rally Size, Members of BTS Sworn-in as Leaders of the Free World

“Look, leader RM has a fair point,” said former president-elect Joe Biden. “The mob insurrectionists who stormed the nation’s capital in an ultimate act of white privilege doesn’t represent America – or at least represent the worst parts of it. But you know who brings out the best of American virtues?” Diamondback Joe questioned as he pushed up an additional pair of aviator sunglasses on top of the aviator sunglasses already on his face, “BTS.”

Girl Groups news

BLACKPINK’s Lisa to Reprise Her Role as Emotionally Abusive Asian Tiger Mom on iQIYI ‘Youth With You’ Survival Show

“Why can’t you dance better? I told you to smile but you just ignore my words and you just -? You’ll never be like your cousins who debuted with CUBE, JYP or YG,” said Lisa after evaluating a B+ performance from survival show competitors. “You don’t have to be sorry to me, you just have to be sorry to all your fellow contestants, show producers, and the millions of watchers of this show. Apologize to them.”

news

“He Got Me,” said JYP over Failed Yugyeom Contract Negotiations. “That AOMG Jay Park Boomed Me”

Veteran performer and label executive Park Jin-young (JYP) was found huddled behind a computer monitor in a dimly lit room whispering his name to himself after a series of failed contract negotiations to retain Yugyeom within GOT7.

“He got me,” JYP said of Jay Park’s rumored signing of Yugyeom to the AOMG label. “That AOMG Jay Park boomed me.”