PANEM, YG STUDIOS—Riding off the popularity of audition survivor shows and facing a growing inability to adequately support artists already under its label, YG Entertainment today announced that it would hold the k-pop industry’s first-ever Battle Royale Hunger Games. As the first of its kind, this new audition survivor show will force idols under YG Ent to violently end each others’ careers until only Jennie remains, as part of the struggling label’s effort to become a profitable company once again.
“Hope is the only thing stronger than shrinking profit margins,” commented one YG executive, “By forcing our talent into a competitive battle to the death, we’ve created a lucrative distraction so that fans of our other artists forget what the real problems are at YG Entertainment.” Raising a glass of champagne towards the concerned looks of its artists gathered together for the press conference, the executive toast the crowd saying, “And may the odds ever be in your favor.”
Upon hearing the news, Jeon Somi met separately with reporters for comment. “I am done being a piece in his game,” said the young up-and-coming idol in regard to YG’s plans. “I have seen exploitation tactics like this before. A fire is catching, and if we burn, YG burns with us!”
Nearing the final episodes of the Battle Royale’s first and final season, a PR contact on behalf of YG Entertainment apologized to reporters for a cancelled debut of the final group. “No matter how great the artists are, the reality of the music industry these days is that it’s very difficult to maintain attention for artists that we don’t want to spend money on. We are deeply grateful for the fans and families of the artists who gave their lives for our short-lived survivor show. To make it up to them, YG Entertainment will sincerely support the future and prosperity of not only Jennie, but also the remaining members of Big Bang.”
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